To empower families to achieve common goals through better communication and mutual understanding.
We believe that many interpersonal problems stem from miscommunication. Each of us has our own unique history and our own personal world view. Our world view includes our individual beliefs about why things are the way they are and why they work the way they do. Because each of us is different, we express ourselves and do things in our own unique way. We also interpret what others say and do in our own unique way. These differences in expression and understanding make us who we are. But they also can lead to misunderstandings.
The goal of mediation is to resolve these misunderstandings by focusing on the participants' different points of view. For example, suppose you sit down next to a fellow bus passenger and make a comment about the weather, and suppose he or she just nods, gets up and moves away. You might think, "What an unfriendly jerk!" But your fellow passenger might simply be preoccupied, or worried about missing his or her stop. You might be hurt or offended, while he or she might be completely unaware of having caused offense. Neither of you is right or wrong. You simply understood the interaction differently.
If a misunderstanding isn't serious or important, we brush it off and forget about it. But when it is serious or important, and when it happens with a family member or a friend, it isn't so easy to ignore or to move on. A simple (or not so simple!) misunderstanding may become a full blown argument. It may lead to disagreements about other things and cause emotional upsets. If unresolved, these disagreements may go on for years, and may escalate into complete rifts among family members or friends or others with whom we regularly interact.
“You don't know where you're going until you examine where you have been.”
—Leslie Wilsher, Founder
When a loved one dies, family members and friends express grief in different ways. Emotions are raw; and things that may have remained under the surface for years rise to the surface. Relationships are pushed to their extremes. Old family patterns – resentments, jealousies, competitions, coercions – come to the fore. Probate mediation, or estate mediation, gives family members a chance to express these stresses and to address them in a way that formal court proceedings cannot.
When a couple undergoes divorce or separation, or experiences some other stressful situation, the entire family can be thrown into turmoil. Emotions are near the surface; and family members can easily feel overwhelmed by all the tasks necessary to get through the divorce, separation or other stressful situation. Divorce mediation, separation mediation, matrimonial mediation and family mediation provide a forum in which couples can focus on what is important in getting through the divorce, separation or other stressful process, instead of getting bogged down in litigation.
At Wilsher Mediation we provide a safe, confidential environment in which each individual can express himself or herself more fully, have an opportunity to share his or her perspective. We bring that individual perspective into focus, giving others the opportunity to understand it better. Through better understanding and appreciation of each individual's unique viewpoint, we enhance communication, making it possible to seek solutions in a way that is more satisfactory to everyone involved.